When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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