this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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