Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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