Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
