I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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