Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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