Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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