fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize