I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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