so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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