We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
