carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
