belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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