Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
