Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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