I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
