Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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