Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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