How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
