that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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