Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
