so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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