is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
