I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
