you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
