Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
im holly from the hills drunk
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
