last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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