Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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