Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
