had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize