Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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