when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Do you still have your period?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
The Olympian is in my bed
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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