they need to just BURY HIM!
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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