Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
