I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
