Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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