i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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