I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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