why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
