we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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