We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
