theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
