she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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