My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
