I've blown a few things in my day
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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