Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
