I wanna bring you to show and tell
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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