You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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