before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
