Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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