So drunk its hurt
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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